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26 October 2007

food

food has been my latest best friend after tears have to retire for the moment to stock up.

i've been using food on myself to release all the emotional pain i am feeling and to de-stress. i eat everytime. usually i eat the most twice a day. but now i eat round the clock. i eat everything. noodles, rice, cookies, dessert, cakes, fruits, meat, vegetables, biscuits, sweets.. just everything that i can eat!!

i've been putting on weight. well, the scale is still showing the same weight but my size definitely have gone way out. or is it the "time of the month" that's why i am eating so much? but still i eat more than i usually eat.

it hurts. i want my tears back. then at least i'll stop eating. i don't want to eat any more but i cannot control.

it sucks that much. mentally tortured. guess now physically too.

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